


Píng Diào

by anxiety_junkie



Category: Firefly
Genre: Angst, Character Death, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-18
Updated: 2010-09-18
Packaged: 2017-10-11 23:11:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/118205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anxiety_junkie/pseuds/anxiety_junkie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Written for the <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/fireflyslash/209524.html">Slash-a-thon</a>, for inviolet who wanted, "a smirk, silk, and a sense memory(a sudden remembrance of how something felt/tasted/smelled/etc.)" Beta'd by the lovely lvs2read. Flashbacks in italics.</p>
<p><i>píng diào</i>: to pay homage to the deceased.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Píng Diào

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [Slash-a-thon](http://community.livejournal.com/fireflyslash/209524.html), for inviolet who wanted, "a smirk, silk, and a sense memory(a sudden remembrance of how something felt/tasted/smelled/etc.)" Beta'd by the lovely lvs2read. Flashbacks in italics.
> 
> _píng diào_ : to pay homage to the deceased.

Mal hated going into the infirmary.

Part of it was the smell. It always smelled like disinfectant, and every time he caught a whiff of it he was gripped by memories. Simon's hair had always smelled a little like that, no matter how many times he washed it. Though Mal hadn't minded so much back then. It was just part of Simon.

 

_"One of these days I'm just going to let you bleed to death."_

_"Ow! Wouldn't that be against some kinda doctor's code or something?"_

_"Oh, I could easily make it look like an accident. Zoe would certainly believe me if I told her that, say, a bullet nicked an artery and you bled out before I could locate the problem."_

_"I don't much appreciate a smirk that evil on the man sewin' me back together, Doc."_

 

The lights were too cold. The rest of the ship had warmer, dimmer bulbs placed strategically to illuminate while using as little power as possible. But the light in the infirmary was cold and bright, with an eerie bluish tint, and he hated that. Made his eyes ache something fierce if he stayed in there too long.

 

_"Aren't you up a little late, Doc?"_

_"I couldn't sleep. You?"_

_"Same. Must say, don't think I've seen you drink much since Canton."_

_"Yes, well, you didn't know me at MedAcad. Which is probably a good thing, since I had this tendency to take off my clothes when I got drunk."_

_"You don't say?"_

_"I wouldn't laugh if I were you, Mal. At least **I** never got married by accident."_

_"Point taken. Your glass seems a mite empty there, maybe I should fill it up for you."_

_"Why, Captain Reynolds. If I didn't know better, I'd think you wanted me to take my clothes off."_

_"Oh, I'm just tryin' to get us both drunk, Doctor. Not rightly concerned about what happens after that."_

 

It was just too gorramn clean in there. Mal didn't consider himself to be an overly messy fellow, but he certainly wasn't averse to having a place look a bit lived-in. Made a body feel more comfortable in their space. But even Jayne knew the dangers inherent in a dirty infirmary, so they all took turns scrubbing the place down every few days.

Well, except River. Strong as she was, there was only so much he could ask from that girl.

 

_"I think I said 'no' pretty clear, Doc."_

_"Why not?"_

_"You are not goin' off to some moon filled with people we don't know and workin' yourself into the ground for a handful of platinum. We need you here."_

_"I thought you said the next job was going to be a milk run. You could spare me for a couple of days."_

_"Did you somehow manage to forget why you're on my boat in the first place?"_

_"You know your only reason for objecting to this is so you can have your own way."_

_"I'm the captain of this gorramn boat, I always get my way."_

_"Always, huh?"_

_"…Um. Well, I have been known to bend ov- I mean, **bend** occasionally."_

_"Good to know. Maybe you should think about doing that. Right now."_

_"You always got the best ideas."_

 

Being in there just brought back too many memories.

It's not as if he hadn't spent more than his fair share of time in there before Simon came – he was the captain, after all, so people just naturally tended to aim for him first. But having a real doctor there, one with an overly sharp tongue and some of the gentlest hands in the 'verse, that had taken a load off his mind.

He tried not to think too much anymore about all the other things Simon had done for him.

 

_"Why is there a cake in our bunk, Doc? It sure as hell ain't my birthday."_

_"Well, I wouldn't know that, would I? Since you refuse to tell me when that is."_

_"Gorramn right. So what's all this, then?"_

_"I checked the papers, and you bought Serenity five years ago today. I thought if we're going to celebrate anything, it should be that."_

_"And it's an excuse for cake."_

_"It's like you know me."_

 

Mal locked the infirmary door behind him and ran upstairs to the galley, finding River at the table with a pile of white silk handkerchiefs in front of her that she was neatly stitching together into a long streamer. Each square had the initials _ST_ embroidered in blue on the corner, and he did his best not to look at them as he walked past her to get to his bunk.

 

_"Simon, what the dì yù are these?"_

_"Nothing. Here, let me…"_

_"C'mon now, no secrets between us. If these silly things have got a story then I wanna hear it."_

_"Fine. They were a gift from my grandmother for getting into MedAcad. She died six months later, so they're the last gift I ever got from her. Happy now?"_

_"Didn't mean to upset you."_

_"Sorry. It's just…well, you're not the only one who doesn't like to talk about their past, Mal."_

_"I know. Will you let me make it up to you?"_

_"Oh, I suppose you can try."_

 

Mal changed into his sleeping pants and climbed into his far-too-empty bed, hoping that tonight he'd dream about the war. Or Miranda.

Anything but Simon.

 

_"Simon! Tianna, no…"_

_"Mal?"_

_"I'm here, lie still."_

_"River?"_

_"She's fine, not a scratch on her as usual. Just hang on, you're gonna be okay, Zoe'll fix you right up."_

_"We get paid?"_

_"Don't you worry your head about that now, hear me?"_

_"Guess you were…right about what happens when…the doctor gets himself shot."_

_"Don't you die on me too, Simon. Simon, don't you dare!"_

 

~fin


End file.
